新年新气象

The new blogger customised template is so awesome, I feel like changing the look for my blog everytime I log in. Which is evidently not very often. wahaha.

2010 is officially gone and here comes 2011. The next decade in the 21st Century.
I've been bothered by the fact that I haven't achieved anything significant in 2010. Somehow nothing seems to have etched in my mind. Or perhaps I've done so many things in 2010 that I just don;t remember them anymore.

After looking through my schedule book, I realised the most significant thing I did in 2010 is to pass my driving test and become a qualified driver. Not that I've gone behind the wheel ever since I passed. But still I think it's an achievement. I'd very much like to own a car but with the COE prices right now, that will remain a dream.

It kinda bothers me that whenever friends I haven't met for a while asks me how's life and how's work, I'll reply "it's pretty much the same." I'm not sure whether that's good, I guess to me it obviously isn't and so this prompts me to think what "the next step" should be. It's not that I'm unhappy now, but I just feel dissatified somewhat. There's a subtle difference there. But till now, I've no answer. Sian.

I've given up on making New Year Resolutions. Because I just don't keep to them. But then I realised having some goals or plans makes me look forward to the year more.

So here goes:-

In 2011, I wanna...

Visit Chek Jawa in Pulau Ubin
Learn to turn corners on my bike
Climb Mt Kinabalu
Countdown to 2012 in Taipei
Visit Philippines for UST 400th Anni Celeb! (this one failed, cos it's happening on 28th Jan 2011!)

The list will expand, but that's all for now.. :)

《插班生》报到！

如果你还不知道，你就落伍啦！

《插班生》发片啦！

请各位多多支持哦！不说太多，听了就知道！

运气，这东西

一个人的运气是否有额度，是否会用完呢？

这个问题，时而都会飘进我脑海里。

因为我觉得我这一生太幸运了，一切都那么顺利，那么lucky！不可思议地让我有点害怕这一切的美好会有结束的一天。杞人忧天吗？或许是。但也希望提醒自己这一切不是必然的。

怎么说呢？从小到大，在学业上一直是顺利的。不算是特别杰出的学生，但总还是前面那几位。一直都遇到好的老师，好的同学。虽然不是每次考试都有佳绩，但到了关键的那几个考试，总算是令人满意。

课业以外，也遇到令自己很满足、很喜爱的活动。记得有一度周末总是排得满满的，而这些我想上的活动都刚好不会撞期。就是那么的刚好，那么的，lucky。

在家里，从小有祖父、祖母、外公、外婆陪伴长大。虽然祖父、祖母这一两年过世了，但很庆幸自己有20多年的机会认识他们，受他们疼爱。许多人连自己的祖父母都没见过面。所以，我是幸运的。Lucky。

虽然不来自大富大贵之家，但从小什么也不缺，要出国有的去，要上什么课，也没问题。父母会斗嘴吵架，跟哥哥和弟弟也常常会起争执、会斗嘴，但这是我们增感情的方式。这比不说话的家人好吧。

毕业后，也不需要找工作，工作就送上门啦。所以，我是没有找工的经验的。这不是lucky，是什么？

这两天，也是幸运天。前天成功考到驾照（虽然是3rd try 啦，但还是yeah!），昨天更不可思议。

早上下起一场倾盆大雨，我正准备出门去采访，担心叫不到德士，在犹豫是否应该Call Cab. 最后决定去碰运气，到楼下有遮盖的停车地点，看看有没有那么巧会有人在哪里下车。怎么知道就是那么巧，一走到楼下，就有人下车，我就这样叫到了德士，而且还不需要淋到一滴雨。结果还提早到了采访地点。到了那里才发现原来有好些地方淹水，其他记者都被塞在路上。回到公司，同事说，她早上在路上塞了一个小时，还因此迟到了。我就叙说了我早上的幸运事。另一名同时说：“哇，你平常一定做很多好事。”

幸运之神总是悄悄的照顾着我。

谢谢妳。

人生是一堂上不完的实验课

人生总是充满着“寻找”。

寻找理想的学校。
寻找适合的科系。
寻找那份完美的工作。
寻找知心的人。

或许你已经知道自己要找的是什么，又或许寻寻觅觅后发现那不是你要的，但最终目标都是希望有个完美的结果。

所谓的“完美”，也会不断改变，所以就当它是一堂上不完的实验课，继续寻找心目中的“答案”吧。

昨天在Yes 933听到一首新歌《人生实验课》，由新的本地组合《插班生》演唱。有意思。

New Look

Totally time for a new look. It's been planned for a loooong time.. finally put to action with the help of the awesome Blogger customization tool.

As with everything in life, it's still an ongoing process...

Be patient.

Vipassana

Have u heard of Vipassana?

It's also my first time hearing it today and the whole idea sounds so crazy and yet kinda enticing...

Vipassana is a form of meditation, and is taught thru a 10-day residential course. In those 10 days, all you do is sleep, eat and meditate (for almost 14 hrs a day). You will not have any form of communication with you, nor any form of entertainment. (No computer, internet, tv, radio even books). You must not even talk to fellow meditators in the course for 9 days. (The reason dinner conversation became this was cos I was too full and said I wanna 封口，so it led to this other form of 封口。）

So, all you have for 9 days is you and your mind.

It's supposed to help u clear your mind, see things in a different light.

And all you'd be eating is fruits and vegetarian food. (think lose weight)

Best part is, it's a free course.

And it's actually held in Singapore at St John's Island.

But maybe I should try normal meditation first. 10 days is so no joke!

E.L.I.T.E.

What is the definition of an elite? Who is an elite? Does going to an elite school automatically makes me an elite? How do you define an elite school anyway?

This is but a label put upon you. Sometimes I feel it's a label I rather not have, but at times I'm happy to have that.

But it always makes me uneasy to be called an elite. There seems to be so many connotations that comes with this label, bad and good, but seems to be mostly bad. Other than not wanting to be associated with the negative traits, I do not feel that I'm good (ie smart or successful) enough to be an elite too.

The ST article last Saturday does more or less resonate for an ex-Rafflesian like myself. Tho I'm only a third Rafflesian (only been to RJ rather than those who are on the Raffles family from Primary to JC), I think the issues in question are applicable to anyone who is lucky enough to be in good schools their whole life. mixing with friends from respectable and mostly loving /supporting families with a great learning environment. Can be someone from HCJC, VJC, TJC, NJC and come from the top 10 or 20 sec schs. It's no doubt the school environment and the people you hang out with shape who you are and how you think and view the world.

I think my first jolt to reality came when, at a inter-school leadership camp, where prefects from my sch (DHS) have combined camps with prefects from other, what they call neighbourhood schools. As we discuss the kind of disciplinary problems we have to deal with and help each other out on how best we can deal with them, you realise how insignificant your problems of catching ppl who have their shirts tucked too far out and wearing ankle socks are, compared to those who deal with students who smoke and steal and fight. You do not face them and you just can't understand. You come from a loving family, and so do most of your friends. You do not have to worry about monetary issues and do not have to work during holidays to make sure you have something to eat at recess when sch starts. You just have to study hard and be a good student. That's your job.

I'm as un-Rafflesian as one can be. I like Mandarin, I'm not good in English. I join the Chinese Orchestra, I study weird subject combinations (more than half of RJC students are in triple science). Many are rather surprised at my decision to chose RJC. And why did I choose RJC? Because I want to study Japanese at A Level (and that's the only place in Singapore that offers it), I want to improve my English, I think I will benefit from a different kind of environment.

Anyway, being Rafflesian or not is also a kind of stereotype isn't it? In the end I still made good friends whom I can clique with, more or less enjoyed my time at the school and come out with better command of English and understanding of what the "elites" are like.

It's so sad to be shedding tears just because you do not get 4 As or 5 As at A levels, relentlessly pursue excellence in every single way possible (be a leader, serve the max no of comm service possible, represent the sch in every competition possible) and not stop to experience what life is about, or think about what life is like for "commoners" out there.

In a way, my choice of profession is already very "un-Rafflesian" as my brother puts it. Most Rafflessians eventually end up as doctors and lawyers and bankers and be top civil servants, earning big money, and I'm but a poor (literally) journalist. They easily earn at least 30% to several times more than what I'm earning right now.

But then, I'm not quite "Rafflesian" to begin with.

Labels. They are never ending.

it's another great day out with the girls today. nv fails to be energy and/or events filled. there was no USS or roller coaster like we envisioned it to be, but there was still trusty Sentosa and a fulfilling meal.

but then, it was the results of the random decision to do a personality test among all on the grp that amazes me. and so did the discussion over supper after.

we can be so different, and yet so complimentary. there is always a place for u in this world, a way you can contribute.

let the powers combine.

梁智强VS老虎伍兹记者会

“梁智强”三个字，大家应该已经听腻了、看腻了吧？还是觉得意犹未尽呢？

前天采访了他的记者会，场面比巨星来访还轰动，情节也比8频道剧集还戏剧化。虽然接到任务时，心里是相当不愿意去采访这类纯碎属于娱乐八卦，干预别人私事的新闻，但能在本地体验到如此轰动的场面，也应该仅此一次。

不计其数的人也已经对此事件，通过各个平台发表了自己的意见。我也忍不住要插一句。

我说了什么？请点阅：958新闻室博客

《听说》

我已经见人就推荐啦，但还是想要在这里推荐一下这部台湾小品《听说》。

没有带着任何期望，甚至不知道故事情节就跟随台湾朋友去看了这部电影。或许就是因为没有任何期望，所以它出乎意料带给了我惊喜。是一部让我笑得很用力，也哭的很用力的电影。当然加上男主角很帅啦。

我发现，不要带任何期待去看一部电影，收获总是比较大的。最近因为大家都把Sherlock Holmes说的很好而慕名进电影院看，却稍感失望。就像朋友说的，她在排山倒海的推荐下，看了《海角7号》，看了以后，就觉得也不过如此。而这部电影只冲着是台湾片和彭于晏（很帅的男主角）去看，也给她带来意外的惊喜。

所以，我也知道让大家抱有很大期望去看一部电影的败笔。所以，如果你要去看《听说》，请忘了我以上写的。:P

avatar 之狠篇

阔别N年以后，我爸爸终于带我妈再度进入电影院。

是什么电影这么有魅力？就是史上以最快速度破十亿票房的Avatar.

可是3D电影没有中文字幕，害他们看得蒙查查。结果换来我妈说：

“看什么烂电影。人不像人鬼不像鬼，很恶心。打来打去炸来炸去，一点都不好看。浪费我3个小时坐在那边，还睡着。浪费11块钱。没有跟我讲是什么戏就拉我去看！”

深受好评的Avatar就这样给我妈骂得一文不值。我和我弟听了都不知道该从哪里开始跟我妈解释电影好在哪里。

我爸爸好不容易请妈妈去看电影，而且是3D Avatar， 却被老妈骂得狗血淋头。好可怜的爸爸。

history lesson

Did you know why the ABC market in Bukit Merah is so named?
Did you know what used to be where Ikea at Alexandra is now?

Was taking the cab home from work after my night shift the other day when I got a history lesson from the cab driver instead. Was quite irritated with him cos he can't quite stop talking from the moment I got in, and then he asked if my colleague was rich cos he fetched her home before and remembered she lived in landed property and even remember exactly where. First I was disgusted and then I was horrified. Who knows what he can do with these info. Taxi uncles are scary.

As much as I found him irritating, he was quite educational as well.

Apparently, Ikea used to be the warehouse for ABC stout beer. The area was a very bustling area, and Alexandra Village Market used to be the train station. Jalan Bukit Merah was non-existent then (then is prob abt 50 yrs ago). As there is a market behind the ABC warehouse, which is somewhat of a landmark then, people decide to call the market ABC market. Subsequently, ABC moved, the warehouse gave way to other things and is now IKEA, but people still call the market ABC market. It has an official name, but most ppl can't identify with the name, so the name stayed.

Now that's something I never know tho I've known the market since I was way little cos my Grandpa's factory used to be across the street.

Well, the taxi uncle actually asked me how long I had been staying in the area, and how come I did not know this story. No one ever told me that loh.. I mean it's "nice" of him to share this story, but dun need to say in that manner k. Just as I was warming up to him, he zham break in front of the red light and I almost got strangled by the seat belt. (I was sooo glad I had the seat belt on, as I've come to conclude taxi uncles after midnight is not always sane n alert.) Anyway, he was too engrossed in talking to realised the light turned red and as there was a speed camera there so he had to stop.

And just before I alighted, he said he was hoping I would be the one taking his cab when I was walking towards the taxi stand as he remembered where I stayed and that means he can still go town area to get more customers. He said my colleague stayed at too ulu a place so he'd rather not ferry her. OMG. I wish I'd nv have to take his cab again.

反思，一大堆的反思

HELLO~~

久违了。好久不见。自从我投向Twitter的怀抱后，想要在这里挥洒的欲望渐渐消失。要不是燕姿，我真的不会纵身投入Tweet tweet 世界里。当然还因为有一群“损友”也成天tweet tweet，所以以tweet沟通，多了非常多乐趣。

所以，这里就保留给我在有长篇大论要讲时，才来的地方吧。

anyway，今天看了花木兰。在大家都唾弃它，影评也不是很好的情况下，还是决定看它。因为喜欢赵薇（看到片尾曲是燕姿唱的的时候，更让我想看它。不过觉得这首歌不够那种在战场打斗的气势）。所以，在买票一波三折的情况下，最终在Bugis Shaw cinema看啦。我的第一次尝试。（记得上次尝试在那里看是非常不愉快的经验，tat's another story altogether.)

花木兰这人物，没有认真了解过，不知是真实的历史事故，还是只是一部家喻户晓的虚构故事，反正还是觉得它是很正面的故事。这部花木兰不是完美的，但我还是相当喜欢。

赵薇还是没有令我失望。想当初是从看《还珠格格》开始认识她。岁月的痕迹也开始可以在她脸上看到。

整体故事其实有相当多诙谐部分，而且我觉得它把爱情的部分拿捏的蛮好的。I guess i'm still a romantic, 打斗的场景，点到为止就好。美中不足的，是前半部剪辑跳的太多，it's a little choppy, 而觉得花木兰身为将军，面对兄弟们发言时，架势和气魄还逊色了一些。

虽然花木兰和文泰最终并非完美收场，但是那份感情是非常“美”的。生命总有许多遗憾，这才真实，不是吗？

恰巧今天采访了一则修改BMT军训的新闻，谈到战争和女性受军训的事。因此，看了花木兰，感触异常多。战争，没人想要，但要是身处其中，又能奈何？身为女性，我是否愿意受军训，为保家卫国尽一份力？我的第一答案是，不要啦，太辛苦了。可对男生来说，也是辛苦的吧。不辛苦怎叫军训？

只能庆幸自己是个女生。anyway 没有结论，只是多了很多东西可以思索。

办签证感触篇

你有到大使馆办签证的经验吗？

如果你和我一样，是持新加坡护照的话，应该不会有几次这样的经验。那请你为自己是新加坡人感到庆幸，因为不但为你省了很多麻烦、金钱，也让你少受很多气。

在我的记忆当中，只有亲身到大使馆办过3次签证，结果两次是空手而归，就包括今天。要不是需要以记者身份到中国采访，我也不需要一大早在烈日地下排队，然后遇到一个态度极差的柜台人员（重点她还让我在错的柜台排队），结果我的申请不被受理，还叫我打一个一直被对方切掉的号码。到底是怎样。大使馆的宗旨就是要 make your life difficult?

这绝对不是一竹竿打翻一船人的说法。之前到过菲律宾大使馆，柜台人员的态度也是极差。听一些几乎不管到哪里旅行都需要办签证的海外朋友说，他们在好几个大使馆的经历也都如此。大使馆办公时间短，福利也应该不差，员工怎么都那么哀怨，那么臭脸啊？好歹也是前线服务人员，也应该有基本的服务态度吧？

今天去了一趟大使馆，没有办到签证还是其次（其实去之前就有预感会办不到），而是所见所闻让我有感而发。

排队的时候，就遇见一位auntie带她的女佣去办签证。看不懂所需填的表格，所以我拔刀相助。这位auntie 是幸运的，有能力带女佣一起去旅行，去帮她在中国的住所打扫、在她到处购物时也可以帮她提购物袋。

在柜台，看到一对年过60的夫妇办签证。他们在柜台弄了半天没弄好，柜台人员一直说他们要填这个，没填那个，弄了半天他们似乎还是弄不清楚状况，而他们明明就跟彼此讲华语。申请者把表格填错了，至少心平气和的跟他说哪里错，而不是一味叫他改啊，他怎么知道要怎么改？后来两人看来非常无助，也看得出他们觉得很不好意思，又不知道哪里出错，我又有机会再出马了。

后来，两组老人都跟我说，他们是因为子女在网上帮他们买机票，才需要亲自到大使馆办签证，以前都是托旅行社办的，所以才会觉得不知所措。子女不是住的很远，就是忙工作，也只能在买机票上帮忙，不能代为办签证这种事了。我们年轻人认为很方便，能在网上买机票这回事，却带给了他们困扰。代沟，也就是这回事吧？

败犬女

读了这期i-周刊关于败犬的主题专访，觉得我符合了几乎所有里面列下的败犬特征。

我=败犬？ OK 啦至少年龄还没到，但是觉得晃一晃就会过了。

看来我应该去看看《败犬女王》这部戏了。

讨厌

我讨厌人家明明知道事非我意还要强加于我。

我讨厌没有被征求同意就对我的生活做出改变。

其实，我认为我是相当随便的人，大多时候，只要征求我的意见，我会不好意思拒绝而同意或答应。

但我也发现，我往往会因为这样而吃亏。可能不是什么大亏，但一点一点累积起来，心里可能就会出现不平衡。

我决定要学会说不，这是一种学问，一种艺术。但这会让我活得更像我自己。

当然，我还是会有任性的一面，对某些事情比较执着， 尤其对家人。请容许我的任性。

HAPPY 44TH BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE!

Would you say you love Singapore?

Somehow it seems like the uncool thing to do to say that you love your country in this country. What's wrong with being patriotic? It's not being PC or brainwashed by the country. Say it if you mean it.

Was having a conversation with a grp of frens and a fren said sth abt ppl in other countries seemed to feel so much more nationalistic than Singapore, wearing their flag wherever they go, proclaiming they are citizens of so-and-so country. We don't even bother flying it on National Day. Another fren drew conclusion that cos we are not as homogenous as some societies, it's harder to feel nationalistic. Is that so? What about America?

I must say I don't always feel this way, and my numerous trips overseas and spending time out of Singapore and interacting with ppl from various nationalities actually gives fresh perspective as to what it means to have Singapore as my home, and gives me new found respect for my country and be thankful that I am a Singaporean. Things we so take for granted like a roof over our heads, clean water and not having to apply for visas when we travel are things that ppl do not have access to.

Another fren working at an MNC says that when typhoon hits Taiwan or Hong Kong, when there's snowstorm in London, basically when something happens in some part of the world, the Singapore branch has to take over the operations and the staff have to work harder and she has to take weird shifts to cover the duties. It's undesirable to her, but it also means that Singapore is relatively safe from disaster right?

This is not a perfect place, I'd very much like to see many areas being improved, being changed, but everything is a work in progress right? It's so easy to just leave when you are not happy with a place in this day and age, but would you ever find the perfect place? I think there's no such thing as a perfect place anyway. Do let me know if you find it.

I'd still like to leave the country, to travel, to see the world, but it would be to remind myself of how fortunate and blessed I have been.

It's National Day and I'd be working to cover the National Day Parade. Yes we have it every year, and it is kinda propagandistic. But it's still a day worth celebrating. Many of my overseas friends wow at the kind of celebration we have (tho sometimes I do wonder if iwe're spending too much money on this). Their national days usually pass without fuss, with parades that nobody watches cos it's early in the day. I would say our NDP is quite one of a kind, and there is a reason why ppl yearn to get tickets to the parade every year. It really feels very different when you are with the crowd. It's addictive, you'd wanna be back. And you feel proud to be a Singaporean.

It's National Day and what better time to declare your love for your country.

PS I've had a sneak peak to this year's parade and I think it's actually quite good. The art direction is by Ivan Heng, someone with lots of theatre background so yeah, it's really of some standard.

reflections

the Indonesian Presidential Elections is over. SBY won with landslide victory. yeah you know already from various news sources. a fren said my blog is too newsy, and i only blog when there's news. but i can't help that i work in news and that's what i'm in contact with day in day out. so yeah more news to come.

i must say it's been a most rewarding trip, a trip that provided me with new found confidence and zest in my job, a trip that came at the most opportune time i must say.

marking my first anniversary on my job in indonesia, covering the presidential elections and getting mostly positive feedback so far is indication for me that i've made the right choice despite the emo-ness i went thru. i can't think of a better way to mark my 1st anni.

it's also been an eye-opener, much in line with my resolution to explore and understand southeast asia more ever since my philippines trips. there is indeed so much to know and learn about SEA, and now i have better inkling of the political system in Indon as well as the problems they face. at least now i know SBY from Mega-pro and JK-Win and I can say that I've been to Yudhoyono's residence! (tho i've nv even been to Istana in Singapore ha!)

所谓初生之犊不怕虎，and i think this best described me when i was there, assuming that it's quite safe and unafraid of what was to come. luckily i only heard the horror stories of indon only AFTER i came back. haha. and lucky that nothing has happened to me there. ppl there seemed friendly and willing to talk to me while doing my voxpop. tho there are those weird and uneasy stares that i get from the people sometimes, i think my phil training did me some good. in many many ways actually, indon reminds me of phil: a language i do not understand, bad traffic, slums, shopping = malls, country with colonial history, vibrant political scene, generally friendly people.

it only been a week since i'm back, and somehow sharing my indon experience on air today seemed really surreal already. reflecting on the trip, i don't know how i did what i did, but i did it! i surprise myself all the time.

when will Singapore's political scene be half as exciting? when will Singaporeans be willing to talk openly about politics? i look forward to that day.

enough of words, now for some pictures (that are all up on FB already actually).

behind the scenes: setting up the camera for CNA correspondent to do live reporting.

voting over, start vote counting. :Lanjutkan! (that's the slogan for Yudhoyono's team)

SBY in the lead.

At SBY's residence. Media galore. All ready to get a shot of the President as he conducts a press conference (yes, in Bahasa Indonesian). I'm contented standing by the speaker.

Saying goodbye at the CNA office.

Doesn't this CNA cameraman look familiar? Think "don't worry, be happy."

The only touristy shot. In front of the main traffic circle, a favourite spot for protests. (ooops even my touristy shot has a news spin to it. ha)

潜入印尼总统选举

又要出国啦，而且是第一次去公干。

虽然是非常临近的国家，但还是一个不熟悉的环境、不熟悉的语言。

被问及是否要到印尼采访总统选举是，我的第一反应是：不要。

因为语言的障碍，加上本身不是很关注印尼政治，所以却步了。但是过后想想，老板会这样问我，就是认为我能胜任，给我一次宝贵的学习经验，那我又为什么要怀疑自己呢？

所以，最终还是答应了。决定的很匆忙，所以开始时觉得相当不安。但是又遇到非常愿意给予帮助的好人，觉得这次的行程应该会顺利。

我生命中总有一个接着一个的贵人，对此，我非常感激。

不过贵人不能帮我收拾行李，所以还是要自己做。回来再进一步分享。

我做到了！

我会骑脚车了！
自転車乗れます！
I CAN BIKE!

I've CONQUERED the bicycle!!! I'm so proud of myself. haha. despite me having said that I wanna learn how to bike since 2006, I did not put it into action until about a month ago.

And in 4 sessions, I learnt to bike!!! Ok lah not very impressive results, cos my bro keep saying he learnt it in 1hr. But who cares, what matters is I can bike now! Wahahaha!

Tho I still can't turn corners.
Tho I will swerve from left to right uncontrollably sometimes.
Tho I rammed into a roller blader and almost made her fall.
Tho I still can't brake properly.
Tho I'll get stressed out when I see approaching bikers and people who are too close to me on the road.

At least I can bike now! And I'm confident I can overcome ALL that soon. Anyone who wants to bike pls jio me out. haha! soon I'll be able to do nite cycling and road trips on bikes. that sounds exciting! it's no longer a handicap. yeah!

***

anyway I've lapsed out of my emo-ness, and made my decision. I'll give it another year, I tell myself as I feel there's still so much to learn and it had been a really great experience so far. Maybe I tend to forget the unpleasant stuff, but I find this a positive trait of myself. Live and be happy right?

and on yet another note, congrats Diya for proving ur worth and getting the chance to go to Taiwan (yet again) to show the talents Singapore has! It was such a 百感交集 day, cos we were REALLY happy for Diya, but REALLY sad for Carrie at the same time. I nv tot I could have such a mix of emotions in myself.